We help people create and experience the coming Golden Age of humanity, personally and communally.
We help individuals and groups resolve today’s chaos and enter the promised Golden Age of humanity, in the areas of money, environment, peace and love, health, mind, and governance.
We achieve this through awareness, new thought, redefining the subconscious Map of Reality (self-view + world-view), expanding consciousness, teaching mindfulness, and researching solutions to individual and global challenges.
Yes, it may not seem like it is, but things are finally working out. Relax :)
My name is David. I'm not a guru. I'm a rare information curator, publisher, and implementer. My inspired talent is in researching and curating esoteric evidence into practical concepts. I'm especially good at connecting the dots.
I am also a life-long entrepreneur, business architect, and an ardent student of the human body-mind-spirit complex.
I was the Creative Consultant on The Secret (the 2006 movie) and I'm the author of the international best-seller, A Happy Pocket Full of Money. But like you, I am a student of life.
I was born on March 6th, 1975, in Nakuru, Kenya. Nakuru is famous for its rhinos (I have actually been chased by one) and flamingos. I love life, the mysteries of life, and traveling! I also love helping people to flourish!
I hold a BSc. in International Business from Jacksonville University, Florida, USA. I also have an MSc. in Information Technology from Griffith University (Queensland, Australia) and I am a Microsoft Certified Solution Developer. Plus I read and travel a lot! I am currently in film school at the SAE Institute, learning to be a writer/director/producer.
And now, here is my crazy but true life story, in full HD color...
Let me tell you about my crazy personal life story very quickly...
(and how you can use it to pretty much crush any conscious or subconscious obstacle in your life and achieve the abundant manifestation of your desires powerfully)
Call me Fake.
Sir Fake, actually.
Because that is what I used to be. An invisible man with a good mask on.
I drove myself from this...
...through tough times like these (and I hated them)...
And eventually I "won". I think.
But along the way, I lost contact with my True Self, the loss of which was the beginning of great inner turmoil and challenges...
And I became Sir Fake...
And so every day the sun shone, having no alternative, on nothing really new.
For the longest time, it was the same shit different day, different flies. You know?
Same drama, same money issues, same mental and emotional struggles, same old stubborn subconscious blocks and limitations, same spiritual crisis, same "return-to-the-old-bad-patterns" despite the latest-greatest-uplifting-book-or-seminar, same old fears and worries and resistance, same insecurities and self-worth doubts, same "what will people say or think about me" useless turmoil, same quest for meaning, same weary confusion and frustrations...
Yes, yes. I know you know the drill.
But now the sun shines on something new every day!
I love it now. I really, really do. :)
And I'll show you how I did it as we go along together. But let's not jump ahead. Back to the story...
For you see, I was born twice.
Once on March 6th, 1975, in Nakuru, Kenya...
And then I was born again not so long ago.
When the sun started shining on something new every day!
Done with the old drama, done with the old money issues, done with the old mental and emotional struggles, done with the old stubborn subconscious blocks and limitations, done with the old spiritual crisis, done with the old "return-to-the-old-bad-patterns" despite the latest-greatest-uplifting-book-or-seminar, done with the old fears and worries and resistance, done with the old insecurities and self-worth doubts, done with the old "what will people say or think about me" useless turmoil, done with the old quest for meaning, done with the old weary confusion and frustrations... I'm not saying there are no more challenged. No. There will always be new challenges. But at a higher plane of existence, so to speak. Much, much better, I find.
How did that happen?
It happened after I woke up and clearly and undoubtedly understood and admitted to myself that I had turned into the wrong person over the years of societal conditioning and a tough childhood. Turned into Sir Fake.
Like an alcoholic on recovery, the first step to sanity was acknowledgment, followed by a willingness to right things.
But who really is Sir Fake?
Well, he ain't a bad guy. Not at all. He just is, well...
Sir Fake = The Effort-er. Always trying, manipulating, controlling, dodging, hiding, puffing, shrinking, worrying... Very busy. The mask. The one that believes in "Fit in and forget Who You Really Are... Just blend in, be "normal", do as you are told, fit in, and make the insanity work, OK? And forget about the "invisible stuff", grow up and face hard reality! Fit in! Can you do just that and not screw it up?"
And Sir Fake had to die if I was to be born again, liberated and empowered.
The time had come for Sir Fake to die. Yes, the time had come.
Simple, really. Or is it?
Not exactly. Well, it is simple, but not easy. It's not easy to find the face you had before your parents were born. But it's right there, under the societal conditioning and programming.
We will get to that later on how I did it and how you can, too, if you like...
But first, back to the story...
Incredibly, over all these years, many people thought that I, Sir Fake, was a guru with a perfect life!
Why? Because I wrote a captivating and enlightening book called A Happy Pocket Full of Money, and I was the Creative Consultant on The Secret which was on Oprah and Larry King Live, and so on...
But let me tell you the cold, hard, liberating truth...
Several years ago, I was royally f*****d!!
I was down on my knees!
- Homeless and sleeping on a friend's couch. For several months.
- Facing panic and anxiety attacks.
- A broken mind bordering on a nervous breakdown.
- Emotional anguish.
- And a dark night of the soul to boot.
- Nothing worked. I felt like everything, even God, had abandoned me.
So how on earth did I get from here:
Through having a business degree
but nevertheless being broke and homeless on a friend's couch
and almost mentally and emotionally breaking down...
To my rebound...
And eventually to my rebirth?
And what happened in between?
And how did all my issues and limitations get fixed?
More importantly, how can that help YOU fix the parts of your life that are either broken or could do with a makeover or massive empowerment and expansion?
Perhaps it is best if I tell you the rest of my story, and along the way, we can "pull over" every now and then and chat about these things that I discovered for you...
Thank you for your continued interest in my crazy true story.I promise I will make it well worth your while :)
So, where were we? Oh, yes... Like I said last time, I was born and raised in Kenya.
My mother says the things she noticed most about me was that even as an infant I wanted:
- all life forms to be treated with equality, dignity, and honor
- that I loved good quality
- and that my predominant disposition was freedom and laughter
(You will see why this detail matters in the story later on).
Now, I always deeply loved Kenya's beauty and nature...
...but as a kid, I really hated a lot else about Kenya, because back then I saw and interpreted it as an attack on what I felt within me was my true nature and entitlement. An attack on my beliefs in the right to freedom, creativity, high concepts, abundance, spiritual inclusion, and acceptance of all regardless of dogma, politics, tribe, religion... yes, even as a kid I felt these. And so I just wanted to escape!
To put it another way, Kenya was one of my monsters to overcome, the physical manifestation of my shadow self (my dark side). That is a sad thing to have to say about a person's beloved motherland, but in my case, that was the perception accepted as "true" by my self-concept.
Let me break it down for you...
First off, Kenya was run by a dictator - so forget about human rights, freedom and development - this was an active and deliberate force empowered with State machinery and government organs, acting daily and deliberately AGAINST freedom, human rights, and progress. Here he is...
Now, listen to this: this guy ruled the country for 24 years, from 1978 to 2002! I was born in 1975, which means that this guy was president for most of my life! A dictator!
I mean, as a kid and young man, I hated this guy.
Now I don't, but back then, it was on!
Today, truth be told, we kinda miss him fondly nowadays, he was funny! No hard feelings. But back then, hard feelings aplenty!
He ruled so long that even both Bush presidents found him there:
While other countries were growing forwards, Kenya was going backward with corruption, police brutality, crime and robbery, poverty, guaranteed daily power cuts for hours on end for years...
I'd turn on the TV and watch other countries booming and enjoying life, and then walk out of our house and see poverty and problems and crime.
Broke my heart, crushed my spirit :(
Oh, the crime, the lack of value for life.
So easy to kill or maim, and it was done so often. WHY???
Metallic doors and grills on all windows in all houses. Strange accidents and deaths. Life was fickle.
Sorry, I can't resist asking you this question... have you heard of how your childhood environmental conditioning can limit you for the rest of your life? It can even limit people for generations upon generations, like an inherited invisible crippling of the heart and mind!
I bet you understand what I am talking about, I bet you have seen people who are broken because of negative childhood environmental conditioning.
Well, there is a hidden gem in negative or limiting conditioning because if you can learn to overcome it, you can sometimes be even more powerful and free than those who had it easier.
But that is a big IF!
Fortunately, I did. I overcame it. And I would love to show you how I did that later on...
Anyways... back to my story. Where was I? Oh, yes... Inside, ever since I was a small kid, I felt I belonged here...
But instead, I grew up here...
Sometimes I didn't even notice it, I was happy!
But sometimes... it just broke my heart. Why us? Why ME!!??
And that was the life-puzzle I had to solve, my friend :)
If it wasn't for that puzzle, you and I wouldn't be sharing powerful life solutions right now.
Talking of watching TV, we had only ONE channel (Voice of Kenya - VoK), and it went on from 5.30pm and shut down at 11pm (five hours per day). It was run by the government and heavily censored, and each day started with the national anthem followed by a report on what President Moi said and did that day.
And it was illegal to have cable TV or satellite dishes (in fact, at one time, even fax machines were banned because the government couldn't tap them as easily as they could tap into phones - and almost all phones were tapped).
You were only allowed to watch that one channel. And one radio station. That's it. True story. Up until the 1990s. This is an actual photograph of the VoK program line up (actual photograph, not some Photoshop image - you can't make this up):
So Kenya was my "monster to overcome", my shadow. But I had a second one... at home...
At home, some things were also strained and constrained in somewhat of a similar way.
My parents are some of the best parents one can wish for. They did a stellar job to the best of their abilities to ensure we had the best education and comforts they could afford- despite what the country offered.
However, I was almost always at loggerheads with my father. And that relationship defined me negatively up until my late 30s when I finally healed from it.
Let me explain...
My father is a doctor. Very principled, very strong, very disciplined, very traditional, very smart and very, very good at what he does. And a great provider. Very generous, even. To be honest, he is a very lovely, kind, and hardworking man, and I am super grateful and lucky to have him as a father. Here we are, my father, my two brothers, and myself (eldest, followed by William and Peter)...
But like all people, he, too, had a dark side - and that is what really drove me mental.
I suspect his dark side arose from the fact that his father (my grandfather) was an orphan who ended up having 42 children and 7 wives whom, according to what I hear, he treated with a level of very harsh "tough love". Physically, mentally and emotionally very harsh, indeed. The stories of the crazy things my grandfather did to his kids are spoken of to this day at family gatherings. They greatly feared him!
Anyways, the problem was that back then my father was very regimented and controlling on what you must wear, how you must look, what thoughts and feelings are allowed and not allowed (yes, it went to that level, controlling the thoughts and feelings that you must have), what career you must take, who you must fall in love with and marry, what and who you must like or not like (yes, seriously)...
And I was, by nature and not by rebellion, quite the opposite of what my father wanted me to be as a person. A conflict was inevitable, almost on a daily basis.
But conflict isn't the problem. Conflict is fine, normal. I can handle that, no worries.
The problem was that back then my father believed in rage-filled punishment as a way to convince you to change and see things his way. That, right there, along with the accompanying ruthless berating, was the problem for me! It drove me mental! Because I would rarely understand what the fuck a beating was for!! It was like living with some kind of violent insanity that you cannot escape from. I always had to walk on egg-shells, all day every day, always wondering if I am doing the right thing. From my perspective, it was insane! And it gave me a LOT of self-doubts, difficulty loving and accepting myself, difficulty feeling valid and worthy and deserving as I am, and so on.
It got ugly and strained, for very many, many years. I was always measured against a standard that wasn't me, I always failed to meet that standard, and I got beatings for it. And if it wasn't a hard beating, it was a hard berating and what felt, to little me at the time, as the rejection of who I really was - not good enough as a person.
By the way, I like what Einstein has to say about this sort of thing...
And so in that time, I developed post-traumatic stress, anxiety and panic attacks, low self-worth, and so on.
I became extra fearful whenever I would hear a car drive into the driveway (Dad is home - freeze!), whenever I had a great idea or inspiration (Dad would say "it won't work, it's useless" to many of my ideas)... basically fearful of any original thought or action that was not exactly the same as Dad would think or act.
(Even into my early 30s (I am exactly 40 now in 2015), I still automatically felt cold when I heard a car drive into my OWN driveway, I still feared "adults" in authority, I still had a hangover feeling that I was about to be punished by something out of the blue, I still reacted to phone calls with unexplained trepidation, I still wondered whether my work was good enough or shameful, I still felt inadequate or guilty for no reason at all... all that stunted growth junk that plagues children that have been physically, mentally or emotionally "abused".)
In short, back then, I felt like Dad was North Korea and I was South Korea.
And as I was a small helpless kid, North Korea always won!
I didn't get a chance to relate to and know my innate beingness, which is a very important part of growing up holistically. Instead of knowing why I felt and thought and saw the world as I did, naturally, I instead had to fear myself and block aspects of myself, divorce the parts of myself that got me into trouble, and this leads to stunted aspects of the psyche.
Without my mother always lifting me up after my father harshly berating or physically "disciplining" me, I doubt I would have been as fine as I am now. Thank you, mom!
Here we are, mom and I...
Looking back, I now see things differently in a whole bunch of ways!
It is now full of light, a new perspective. We have all since reconciled and all is well.
But back then, it was a living nightmare for me as a kid and a young adult.
By the way, I hope you can start to see how this set me up to become a dedicated investigator of the subconscious and how life works? The need to solve my own puzzle!!! More about that later...
Back to growing up...
For high school, I was taken to an ex-colonial boys boarding school that was hardcore! And cold.
It was meant to toughen kids. And there we got even more beatings - from teachers and students alike. And little comforts were illegal and punishable. E.g. taking heated water baths, despite the highland bone-chilling cold, was illegal and punishable (we bathed using jerry cans because that's what we used to fetch water with - one or two cans per shower, depending on water availability, or if the bigger kids didn't take your can after you had lined up to fill it down the hill). Being yourself was also punishable in a whole bunch of ways - everyone had to be totally uniform, like in the military.
Talking of punishments, the choice ranged from 12 or more hard strokes of the cane to washing pigs, to uprooting huge tree stumps, to running in bad muddy terrain for 10km, washing dirty grass with a toothbrush, cleaning pit latrines, and so on. Hardcore stuff, no "sit in the corner" softy stuff. But education-wise, the school always led in the top 3 at the national exams.
Even several years after I had left that high school, I had recurring nightmares of being back there as a student. I would wake up in a cold sweat, and be relieved to see it was just a dream.
I don't know, some kids loved that school, some really did. I'm not saying it was a terrible place, but for me, it was like going to jail.
Sure, I did have some great moments there, of course. And I grew up and learned a lot, a great deal, actually. And for that I am grateful.
But a big bunch of the time, it was a place where they "molded you" (their words, not mine) into a person who was super-excellent at working the system, playing the part. Thinking out of the box or being unique was frowned upon or punished.
"David, just pass the exams and keep your head down and your nose to the grindstone and tow the line of tradition and authority at all costs! Never ever question it, that is taboo."
Anyways, so... I felt trapped in Kenya.
And I hated its unwarranted and sometimes cruel limitations, repression, corruption, restrictions, dangers, and scarcities.
I yearned to be free, to be rich, to express myself and my spirituality and desires and joy and nature and choices without fear of punishment or rejection... to take an evening stroll in the city streets, clean modern streets, feeling safe and enjoying the air without worrying about getting mugged or police harassed... to experience a benevolent lifestyle, basically... and to see the world for myself, not on Voice of Kenya TV!
I yearned for the good life!
Was that too much to ask?
Next, I will narrate to you the bumpy - no, make that the rollercoaster - ride that happened next...
Watching the "good life" on TV, watching shows of people in those other free and modern countries, I felt like I was on the wrong side of the TV. Ever had that feeling? Wrong side of the TV? No?
For example, the very first can of Coca-Cola I ever held in-person was at the end of 1989 when I was almost 15 years old. I kept that can on a shelf in my bedroom as a prized possession for almost a year! No one else in the neighborhood had seen one except on TV. That's what I mean... wrong side of the TV. You want to participate, but you cant :)
Anyways, I felt I was stuck in Kenya. Because if it wasn't the lack of money, it was the &@#^%$#^ visas! You see, in the Western world, anyone can be a backpacker, a budget traveler. Just buy a ticket, hop on a flight, figure out the rest as you go!
But as a Kenyan passport holder, you need more than that!
You need Jesus!
But you need a lot.
First, you need a visa. I cannot just get on a flight to most countries when using a Kenyan passport. No. I need to first apply for an appointment at the embassy. Say I want to go to the US. I have to get a visa, right. And it has to be at the US embassy in Kenya. Even if I am in Australia, and I need to visit the US, I have to go back to Kenya to get my US visa. True story.
And there is a waiting line of weeks or months for appointments (so there goes impulse travel out the window!).
Then, at the appointment, they interview us. We have to show:
- bank statements for the last 3 to 6 months to show we can afford the trip
- bank statements to show we are rich enough not to want to become illegal aliens
- we also have to book all hotels and flights in advance and show that to the embassy at the time of the interview (so forget about backpacking, impulse or casual travel!)
- then, if it is for longer than a certain number of months stay, you often end up taking health tests which may include Xray, blood, stool and urine sample (well, that extreme is for student visas usually).
- finally, you have to show proof of sufficient reason to return to Kenya (e.g. you own real estate).
- and then you get a visa stamped full of conditions and limitations.
I'm not making this up. Check it online.
The whole process makes most Kenyans extremely scared, literally scared, of visiting embassies, because it is a full-scale interrogation where many, many applications are denied. And this is why you typically don't see many Kenyan backpackers exploring the world - they just can't get a visa!
So to get my freedom, I had to learn how to earn a higher income first!
Problem is, salaries in Kenya are pathetically low! Kenya's GDP per capita is only around $1,200, whereas it is $52,000 in the US, $67,000 in Australia, and $101,000 in Norway.
So getting a job was out of the question.
Thus, I had to first learn how to increase my wealth consciousness and escape poverty consciousness, and then I had to learn how to become more financially valuable as a person and then build a high-income business around that, and even learn how to invest that income properly.
Otherwise, I was going to remain stuck in Kenya. And that was simply unacceptable to me.
Talk about motivation!!! That got me motivated big time!
So I started an online business, simply because (a) it required the least capital, which I didn't have and (b) it sold to foreigners who had money since Kenyan's weren't capable of spending on me as much as I needed to "escape".
Now... One last small thing... I used to freeze to death when applying for visas.
But then again, after a while, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right?
Now I don't freeze. Actually, I kinda enjoy the challenge nowadays :)
The sum total of Kenya, growing up pains, high school, visas, dictator, etc limitations forced me to learn how to cultivate an undefeated mind and develop emotional vulnerability such that the obstacle became the way.
(FAST FORWARD A FEW YEARS: Now having mastered it, look at just a few of my visas from my last 3 passports - I have had 7 passports in my life, all but two of which filled up with visas)...
Sometimes, traveling with friends across borders, they would walk in no worries while I, with my Kenyan passport, would be stopped at every border stop for questioning. Every single time! Was embarrassing!
Needless to say, I wasn't proud of that aspect of being Kenyan. I found it degrading at the time.
Nowadays I have learned to feel worthy regardless of whatever! Doesn't matter what, I feel worthy.
Lack of self-worth is a problem that plagues billions of people, and I am glad I figured out how to overcome that crippling condition once and for all. I will show you how to do that for yourself later...
But back then, my Kenyan passport and all it meant and how I was treated for it just made me feel like I was a 3rd class citizen of the world. Like I didn't belong.
And talking of money, Kenya just made it damn hard to make some!
First, lack of industrialization is crippling!
It was extremely difficult to run my online business without electricity or the Internet for most of the day and night!
Sometimes I would get just 4 hours of electricity and the Internet in a 24 hour period!
Most blackouts were unplanned and happened without notice, but sometimes they were kind enough to advertise the planned blackouts in the newspaper like this here below (so you can get a Coke and a Smile and prepare to be properly disappointed from 9AM to 5PM)...
To get a better idea, see this NASA photo of the world at night:
Oh, and the Internet was expensive! At some point, I was paying around $200 a month for the relatively slow Internet that often failed. Had no alternative. I often wondered how it would be like to have uninterrupted electricity and the Internet every day, all the time. It was like dreaming of heaven!
Talking of which, let me tell you about the time I got crabs. Yes, pubic lice, goddamnit!! I only ever got it once, and it had nothing to do with sex. It had to do with electricity and the Internet! How?
Well... So my father is a doctor, right? And hospitals have backup generators. And I was trying to run an online business, so I needed electricity and Internet. So Dad talks to a friend of his, a gynecologist. The gynecologist has extra office space. Gynecologist gives me office space. I am happy. I have electricity and Internet! WOW! Every day I go sit in the gynecologist office, happy to be able to do my work online. Gynecologist also has a toilet in office. I use the same toilet. I just sit on it, never thinking to wipe it or whatever. One day, I notice some creatures living on my private parts... Hadn't been with a girl in that period, I had been too busy working my escape plan. So when I got my new "pets", there was no doubt where they came from... that toilet.
Yes... I'm probably the only person to get crabs in search of electricity and the Internet.
Secondly, at the time, Kenya made it illegal to accept credit cards online. WTF????
So I had to fake a US residential address to get a US bank account etc to be able to collect my monies.
To this day, you cannot withdraw PayPal payments into Kenya (but it is not illegal to take card payments online anymore). In many other ways, Kenya just made it unreasonably difficult to get ahead financially.
But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
Eventually, it does, yes. And it did.
In fact, if it hadn't been for these obstacles, I am almost 100% sure I would NEVER have bothered to become a serious, committed and thorough investigator of "how life works", I would not have written my books and courses, I would not have worked on The Secret, I may never have investigated spirituality, wealth, abundance and the subconscious... And so on. You and I wouldn't have come into contact. More about that later...
But in the meantime, these obstacles, at least the way I saw them, made me experience chronic lack of money for many years, have to fight negative programming of being "useless and unfitting", battled low self worth, struggle with a habit of judging myself negatively and materially, contend with a knee-jerk reaction of hiding from people before they "discover my damaged self", live with a very strong negative self-critic that sounded like my father's voice internalised, fear of "adults", fear of being "measured" and found wanting, insecure and so on.
At some subconscious level, at the time I:
- believed I didn't deserve success
- believed that my work wasn't good enough
- believed that I wasn't good enough
- believed that people will hurt or control me
- felt that I had an invisible weight that kept me down, unable to rise; great resistance at the cusp of glory and thus I would always fall back
- I self-sabotaged myself so I remain in the dark
- I had a recurring dream I was running to escape something but I was stuck in a bog, a sludge, and it was like running through molasses or glue... very slow, a struggle against the sticky fluid
- I had an expectation of ever-present and imminent invasion and punishment
- I developed the identity of a 3rd class world citizen
So I simply had to learn how to understand and solve my subconscious blockages and programming or conditioning - if I didn't, I would stay stuck in Kenya.
But interestingly enough, this negativity did not fully consume me.
A part of me still felt multi-dimensional with a firm grasp of advanced spiritual and life concepts.
I still had an inner knowing of my destiny.
I knew, at some level, that this material, these experiences, were "work" that I had to get through, unfold and blossom.
I knew I was destined for something great!
And so there was a tug of war between my true essence (Who I Really Am) and my programmed and conditioned identity (Sir Fake).
And for a while, until quite recently, Sir Fake usually won that tug of war, and we suffered for it.
So back to the story... How to escape from Kenya? I made a plan...
My "escape Kenya" plan worked out as outlined below...
(it is hilarious how well it worked out initially, followed by the subsequent financial CRASH and dark night of the soul that awaited me)...
STEP 1 - THE INITIAL DUMB IDEA: Lasted May 1997 to November 1998. I try exporting African crafts or trade information to the West online. No one finds my website. So I earn a net average of less than $80 a month for a year.
STEP 2 - THE "ACCIDENTAL" INSIGHT: Hoping to get found online, I work hard on creating a way to make web pages that come up top 10 on search engine results. I teach myself web programming. I'm desperate!
STEP 3- THE FIRST BREAKTHROUGH: I crack the code! December 1998. I create a tool that ranks pages on the top 10 of search results! Now, if people search for "African crafts", I come out on top 10 search results. But hang on... I realize this ability to rank high is far more valuable than the African crafts! BINGO! I can smell the money! I dump the African crafts and information business and get into the search-ranking business.
STEP 4 - EARNING & FLYING! I call my tool SearchPositioning (later change to PositionWeaver). Initially price it at $39. Write an article on SEO (search engine optimization), submit it to a newsletter I found. Next day, people read the article, like it, click on the link in the author bio, come to my page, pay. I make almost $8,000 literally overnight. It is December 1998, I'm 23, making good money online, and this is unheard of in Kenya! My friends make me a local celebrity. The money starts. The very next day, I fill in an application for a visa to Australia! The next day! No jokes!
See, an old screenshot of people discussing my product back in 1999 (after I had gone to Sydney, Australia):
And then it evolved from being called SearchPositioning.com to PositionWeaver:
So... Money flowing! Troubles over! Or so I thought...
Like I said, I quickly applied for a visa to Australia, literally the day after my first big payday.
- I fly to Sydney, arriving on Christmas Eve.
- The airline lost my luggage so I had no clothes or anything, but I didn't care! The luggage was the least of my concerns.
- I was finally here!
- December 1998. Age = 23.
- I get an apartment, try to settle in.
- I'm free!!
- Can't believe it!! Finally in Sydney, Australia.
It's so NICE! Everything I dreamed of, and more!
Hang on.... Oh oh... the *&^%effing visas again! Grrrrrrr!
- Only allowed to stay 3 months, or less, at a time.
- This begins my 8 years of juggling visas so I can stay.
- Often have to go back to Kenya for a while, come back, go back, come back...
- Sometimes I can stay a year or two, sometimes only a few months.
- Not educated enough on business and investments to be able to convert this one-man-show SEO "business" into something stable and serious enough to get my Permanent Residency. I simply don't know what to do, so I struggle.
Finally, much, much later on, I do crack that code, too, and I learn how to build proper businesses based on your strengths and passions.
Meanwhile, I have no real base, no stability.
- Hopping around between Australia and Kenya and Thailand, just to juggle visas.
- Young and dumb, full of hope and not much else.
- No worries! Soldier on, kid!
- At least I finally started to master the damn visas! Somewhat.
- But all this not knowing what to do is costing me.
- I swear to myself to commit to learning what to do, so I can be free and clear once and for all.
- I sell off my SEO business (the search engines were getting too complicated for me anyway), and dedicate myself to learning what I could. Fully focused on discovering the secrets of what I was missing. Becomes my new full-time job.
- Initially, this produced a book. I didn't intend to write a book, but all that research, when compiled, looked like a book!
- I give it a title: A Happy Pocket Full of Money, and it is about the cultivation of wealth consciousness.
- I put it online.
- Life continues...
- At some point in all this, I go broke.
- I didn't see that coming.
- One day I had, like, maybe $40,000 in cash and debt free.
- Then a few weeks later I am broke and homeless! WTF!
- Months on a friend's couch, wondering where I went wrong.
- Everything I try fails.
- I borrow from friend and foe, and soon my debts start hurting my relationships, too.
Then the Dark Night of the Soul begins. I feel like everything has abandoned me, even my Creator has abandoned me, my guides have abandoned me, people have abandoned me, my skills have abandoned me, my mind has abandoned me, my emotional fortitude has abandoned me, the heavens and the earth have all abandoned me. It feels that way. All sense of consolation is removed.
- One of the worst times ever in my life.
- Cannot describe.
- All my subconscious fears come to the surface.
- An assault.
- At some point, I literally and seriously wished I could die.
- Great torture from within.
Then, gradually, over the months, I stop fighting it and start to watch it, to understand it.
I also became more open to receiving spiritual guidance from within.
(By the way, opening up to receiving spiritual guidance from within yourself is one of the big keys to this whole process.)
I start to see that what I had "lost" was ephemeral stuff. Mysts, illusions.
I start to see that what always remains when all the ephemeral stuff is gone is Who I Really Am, an eternal vastness beyond measure.
And slowly I start to realize I had misidentified myself, taken my conditioning to be my true identity.
It was this error that was being corrected.
First, I notice none of the things I fear are killing me.
I start to see the fear is a lie.
It won't kill me... it's like a hologram.
OK, not the best experience, but not as bad as I thought.
Then, I start to see things differently.
I start to somehow appreciate the dark night and what it appears to be bringing. Painful but good. OK.
Next, I notice gradually that these old fears and dramas are leaving me. The more I am open to seeing them for what they are, the faster and more effortlessly they leave me. The more I resist change and run from fear, the stronger they torment me and hang on. At least now I know what to do with them.
Freedom starts to return.
But better than before. No longer feel the urge to dodge or panic or dive into anxiety like I used to. Better.
Looking back, the three greatest gifts the dark night of the soul left me with were:
- A stronger spiritual connection
- The courage to be emotionally vulnerable (which, by the way, is extremely empowering and liberating)
- The courage to cultivate an undefeated mind (one that sees the obstacle as the way, instead of running away)
But Sir Fake was still somewhat in charge.
Not a total boss like he was before, but still somewhat influential.
In fact, Sir Fake takes credit for the healing I went through.
Of course, Sir Fake had nothing to do with it, but he walks around town acting like it was all his idea and all.
- And he continues to say to me, "Fit in! Make the madness work! Don't screw it up, kid!"
- And it cost me dearly. Trying to "fit in". A lot more dearly than I ever imagined while I was busy "fitting in".
- Fit into what, you ask? Everything! Look around you. Notice anything strange? No? That's what I mean.
- A prison so well made, that the prisoners do not even realize they are in a prison. A prison of their own making. No one to blame, really. A prison of the mind.
Let me ask you something...
What could be worse than having to be seen resorting to living your own life on your terms?
Ever had that fear, in one form or the other? The fear to be yourself?
- It ain't the kind of fear that a lion might inspire. No.
- It is an insidious fear, silent.
- A very fast thought, usually unnoticed, that might say, "Will I be accepted better or worse if I do this or that? Will I be embarrassed /rejected/ ridiculed/ questioned/ hurt/ abandoned/ etc if I am fully myself?"
Yet I now knew, without a shred of doubt, after my dark night of the soul, that being your True Self was the key to total success and happiness in all endeavors.
Yet I was still afraid to be me, to do me. That is a very, very, very limiting condition. And I don't mean rebelling against society, no. Rebelling doesn't necessarily equate to being your true self. I mean fully embracing Who I Really Am, my soul essence.
Here is the thing:
- Societal conditioning is a slave-driver.
- An invisible slave-driver, too.
- It's so subversively nasty, I'm tempted to call it a bitch-master. A consciousness street-side pimp. Making us do cheap tricks for a dollar all day long and never think of asking why. Making us do stuff that makes no sense when you think about it in hindsight. And when we are too old to make it money, it throws us in the gutter, like a smart pimp would do. Yes, a bitch-master seems appropriate terminology for societal conditioning.
- And I discovered it was impossible to serve two masters.
- I could either serve Conditioning, or I could serve my True Self.
- And Conditioning was the opposite in nature to the True Self.
- Conditioning = a collection of survival, defense and approval-getting mechanisms (ego). Weak. A shell.
- True Self = the full, multidimensional, multifaceted, infinite and eternal soul essence. It doesn't insist or force its presence like the ego does. But when welcomed, it is powerful and loving beyond measure.
- Choose, David. Which master will you serve? You cannot do both.
Does that make sense? Are there any parallels you can draw in your own life? I will tell you all about that next, how that worked out for me, and how you can use that for yourself...
Previously we spoke of conditioning and the fear of being yourself and how that was costing me greatly (and I suspect it costs you greatly in some areas, too?).
Conditioning makes you think you are out of your mind when you are being your Real Self.
Conditioning is shit.
Trust me, I have seen its underbelly.
Sure, conditioning will get you a job, get you a date, get you to pay your taxes on time, and get you everything else it is designed to get you when you 'act like you should'. But its a prison, really, IMHO.
Our society's particular brand of conditioning is a very well-crafted prison.
Someone/something deliberately made it. For a reason. It isn't random.
Made eons ago, to be inherited generation after generation.
Like an unquestioned control virus.
You see, the moment one joins the world, learns English and all that, complications do set in...
Can you say the words "collective consciousness"?
I had to find new ways of thought that worked well and broke loose from the prison of conditioning, especially the conditioning of a third-world country ruled by a dictator.
I clearly realized that I needed several components to overcome conditioning, and thus become free and empowered, as follows...
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #1: Abundance Consciousness
I needed to change from a scarcity mindset to an abundant consciousness and mindset. A.k.a. wealth consciousness. They tell you there is not enough. That is a lie. There is more than enough. The basis of this is spiritual - but it makes the financial possible. A Happy Pocket Full of Money, my book (and now the accompanying video course), was the first exploration into that. I actually initially wrote it as notes for myself as I received guidance from within and without. Then later released it for other people to benefit from it. And not surprisingly, people loved it! See some of the thousands and thousands of testimonials I got for it:
The Secret, in which I was Creative Consultant, was another exploration into that.
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #2: How To Leverage Our Unique Strengths & Passions, Get Paid Well For It, Possibly Turn It Into A Real Business, And Invest Like A Pro
Wealth consciousness wasn't enough. Yes, it brought in money, but I kept bouncing between money and no money like a yo-yo. Money in, happy days! Money runs out, start freaking out a bit. I get a hold of myself, then money in, yippee! Then money gone...
Even if I scaled up the wealth level, from small things to big things, the same problem remained, only in different scale!! Boring cycle to stay stuck in! Gots to fix that!
So I needed to learn about the way high-income-earning works, how businesses work, how investments work - and not that basic kindergarten crap they feed us in magazines, but what actual self-made millionaires and billionaires do, and then scale it down to my size. (I saved it for you, too, here you go.)
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #3: Cultivating An Undefeated Mind & Emotional Vulnerability
I also needed to understand how my mind and emotions work. I realized that without the techniques of an undefeated mind and the ability to feel safe in the presence of absolutely ANY emotion at ANY time (a skill that is called emotional vulnerability), everything else fell apart. No matter how rich I got, everything fell apart without emotional vulnerability and an undefeated mind. Got that sorted (I share it with you here).
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #4: Understanding That Life Is Actually Quantum, Not Linear
Then came the "facts of life" that had been so drummed into me by my past. I realized there is no such thing as "a fact of life". There are only beliefs about life, and life itself was fluid, not fixed. It was quantum, not linear. A belief was what created the "fact of life" and all it's supporting evidence. I believe my inquiry into quantum physics was one of the most important things I ever have done in my life - it gave me faith in and a scientific understanding of the possibilities of instant and dramatic change! Why miracles work, basically. Check it out here.
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #5: Becoming Conscious of the Subconscious
Nowadays, we all know that our deepest patterns of identity and behavior are stored in this mysterious place called the subconscious. Everybody knows that.
If your life or a part of your life is stuck and you have tried everything and nothing changes, you somehow know that the problem/solution is in your subconscious.
But what is the subconscious?
Really, what is it? Have you ever been given a straight answer?
I mean, has anyone ever pointed a finger at an actual 'thing', and said to you, "Look, there! You see that pink round object? That is the subconscious! And you see how those little blue gears turn the big lever? That is its mechanism, that is how it works!"
Think about that :)
To me, the subconscious was a big mystery that had to be solved! Because, despite all I had learned, despite being on the "right side of the TV" when it came to being part of the team making The Secret or writing A Happy Pocket Full of Money, despite everything I knew and did, some "bad shit" just stuck on!
- What did this subconscious "bad stuff" want?
- Where precisely was it hiding?
- And how could I sort it out?
Finally, one day, tired of struggling with some of the same old same old for over 30 years, wondering if I will struggle with it another 50 years, I decided that come rain or shine, no matter what, despite what scary monsters lie within, I was going to go in and make the subconscious conscious!
WOW, what a journey!!!!
I... actually, let me save that for later. I don't want to ruin the surprise. You simply need to see it for yourself. The subconscious! A most beautiful system that is not just human but cosmic! And it is at your service. It isn't against you. You just need to know what to do.
You know the first thing I learned about why the subconscious is "subconscious", hidden?
It isn't actually hidden!
Not at all.
So why aren't we aware of it?
Well, do you see gravity? No.
Do you see love? No.
Do you see magnetic fields? No.
Do you see energy? Most likely not.
Unseen energies that make a difference...
You know these things are there all around you, but you don't see them or think them, do you? No.
Because they are multidimensional!
They cannot be detected with the five body senses, because the five body senses are 3D instruments.
And the brain is a 3D tool, too, a computational engine designed to survive and navigate 3D reality. Hence the brain cannot feel love, gravity, energy, magnetism or the subconscious. Have you noticed that the brain cannot feel love? The heart can. But not the brain. Why not?
Let me break it down for you like this: your vehicle (your body), is a piece of technology, and that piece of technology has some sensors designed specifically to generate the sensation of being in a 3D environment (hence the saying we project our reality). The brain is a 3D component. It was built to NOT experience multi-dimensionality; instead, it was built to "reduce" Who You Really Are, down to singular, linear, 3D experience. That is the game! Thus, it is not possible to see love, gravity, magnetism, energy, or the subconscious using that particular component of your vehicle. Instead, you require a different set of components that do come with your vehicle for multi-dimensional experience, but we are conditioned not to turn them on. Yet when you turn those other sensors on, the subconscious becomes as clear as day! It is only that we aren't taught about them.
To put it another way, consciousness has physics. Check it out here.
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #6: Learning How To Re-program The Subconscious
Yes, this is different from making the subconscious conscious. You see, the first step is to see the parts of the subconscious, how they work, and how they connect to each other to form a whole.
That is the first part. Opening up the clock to see how it is put together, how it ticks and how it tocks.
Then, once you see how it comes together, you understand it.
Understanding is the beginning of freedom.
It's like cooking. It is far better to understand the basic principles of cooking first because that allows you to become creative in making up your own recipes. But if you jump straight to making a dish from a recipe without understanding the basic principles, then you kinda become stuck to that one recipe only, and if it goes wrong, you won't know how to fix it.
So the first part is to become conscious of the subconscious, to understand it. The basic principles.
And then the next step is to learn how to reprogram it. The recipes.
"MUST-HAVE" COMPONENT #7: Having A Living Connection With Your Source
A spiritual connection trumps everything!
And I am not talking of religion - you can stick with whatever religion works for you. There is no right or wrong one.
I am talking instead of an inner connection with your Source. A living connection.
Why does this trump everything else?
Lots of reasons. Here are a few...
- The more I opened up to receiving guidance from within, the easier everything became!
- I also came to love myself a great deal more.
- The more conditioning fell off me by itself.
- This was the ultimate self-confidence booster.
- It came with a unique type of abundance I like to call ever-present sufficiency.
- The mind clears up!
- Everything seems a lot more positive or rosy. Little things that used to freak me out or drive me nuts now just fly by like feathers in the wind.
- Bliss comes often.
- Synchronicity increases.
- Whenever I contemplate a big life question, the answer seems to come quickly from within or without.
- I enjoy serving others, gives a great sense of fulfillment. Yet, simultaneously, I find it easier to say no without feeling any need to explain myself. An interesting paradox.
- And much much more.
I have to say that of this whole list, this is the most personal of all. Because no one can take you there - it is a very unique place for each individual. And there is no right or wrong style or way.
However, I find that the one thing in common with all ways and styles is that they all work by leading a person through the process of going beyond the self-created identities (ego).
And next, I will show you how things started to work out just fine once all these pieces fell into place!
So... Once all these pieces fell in place, finally, things started working out just fine!
Nowadays I genuinely get excited when I feel fear coming, because I know it is love in disguise, and the only thing I will find on the other side of that wall called fear is only myself, an expanded version of myself.
Sir Fake began to die, and behind him, as he died, he left more and more of Who I Really Am.
Peace and love and abundance embodied.
Now that is what I call growing!
Challenges still come.
Let nobody fool you that a day comes when challenges end.
There will always be the wave.
We live in a vibrational reality, and that inherently contains waves (waveforms).
There will always be waves.
The difference is, the suffering ends! And the waves feel good :)
The love and power begin!
I'm still learning, still growing, and it never really ends, it simply spirals up to new, nicer levels.
I took stock.
I faced the dragons.
I stopped trying to dodge the bullets because I don't have to anymore.
Once I realized that I and the bullets are One :)
And finally, theory merged into being-ness! Being the knowledge - that is what I had lacked as a final key!
Today, I can honestly say that I have never felt better, been better!
Everything just works :)
Even the stuff that seems not to be working is working behind the scenes.
I feel comfy in my skin.
I love myself as I am, no apologies or excuses or having to first check in with the others for permission or whatever.
I am now capable of diving deep into the subconscious to change things.
I am mentally and emotionally freer every day
I experience very rapid inner growth
I feel "solid and good" inside
I am financially liberated with ever-present sufficiency.
But most important of all, I love my connection with my Creator, for we are One. And that is the greatest achievement of all, to wake up to that connection and self-awareness.
The past is a foreign country; they see and do things differently there.
Upside down, actually.
Welcome to the future!
My mask (a.k.a. my Not Self, my ego) is learning every day to let go and step aside for my True Self to be in charge. No more always trying, manipulating, controlling, dodging, hiding, puffing, shrinking, worrying. A Sovereign Divine Being.
The True Self Just Knows, Is, Does - no drama necessary.
Call me Mr. Real.
P.S. All is good now with the family. We are all now reconciled and life is good, and dad is one of my best friends :) I also left Kenya, and I am now living in Australia and studying to be a film-maker.
P.P.S. I believe Kenya is also on the path to greatness for future generations. Here we are with my mother voting in the new constitution in 2010 :)
P.P.P.S. I collected all I learned in my journey and packaged it into a bunch of videos that can help anyone overcome their monsters. Have a look at this treasure-chest that is available for you here.
Thanks again and have a beautiful day!
Be love, live well, and prosper greatly, in all ways,
David Cameron Gikandi